Tuesday, November 18, 2008

People are Getting Taller

Vince Vaughn and John Cleese are 6’5”

Penn Jillette and Ryan Stiles are 6’6”

Tony Robbins and Krist Novoselic are 6’7”

Brad Garrett is 6’8”

Until very recently Michael Crichton was 6’9”

And Randy Johnson is 6’10”



I spend a good part of my working day walking between homes in New York City. Therefore, I walk past a lot of people. I'd say at least once a day I walk past a woman who is well over six feet tall and a high school-aged kid who is at least 6'6". I'm an inch taller than my father, who was seven inches taller than his own father. If I have any sons they'll probably be taller than me since both my wife's father and brother are taller than I am.

Monday, November 17, 2008

5 Ways New York City is like Disneyland

1. It’s always crowded.
2. Anything you buy is twice as expensive as it is in the outside world.
3. It’s an artificial, man-made environment. Many parts (Central Park, Rivers of America) are fake, but great lengths have taken to make them look natural.
4. Many people possess a fanatical adoration of the place. These people are all really annoying.
5. You see a tremendous cross-section of humanity there—(the disabled, people of all different nationalities).

Flash Mountain

You figure it has to be happening. Now here's photographic proof that it is.

Dr. Drew

In keeping with the theme of my learning everything about life by watching it on TV, I'm going to forward the argument that Dr. Drew is a good professional role model. I find that when I need to discuss something difficult with a client's parent, or when I'm in a situation where I need to sound like I know what I'm talking about, channeling Dr. Drew always helps:

Eva Peron by 104 days

Who have you outlived?

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Oswald Acted Alone

Full Article Here

Greatest hits:

"A team of experts assembled by the Discovery Channel has recreated the assassination of John Fitzgerald Kennedy. Using modern blood spatter analysis, new artificial human body surrogates, and 3-D computer simulations, the team determined that the sixth floor of the Texas School Book Depository was the most likely origin of the shot that killed the 35th president of the United States."

and

"Schliebe, along with Tom Bevel, an independent expert forensic investigator, were brought in to examine the simulated crime scene. Both scientists had no idea what the experiment was for or that it was a reenactment of the JFK assassination."

and

""We might never know if Oswald pulled the trigger, but when you look at the wind pattern, the spread of the debris, the angles and distances involved, it's consistent with a shot from the sixth floor depository," said Martin."

and finally

""I think this is the wave of the future," said Martin. "If we had this technology back in the '60s, I think it would have put a lot of the conspiracy theories to rest.""

Reckoning with Cities, Suburbs, and Small Towns

I’ve had the opportunity to live in all three of these types of places, and in spite of this fact, I can’t clearly say that I prefer one over the others. Each type of place has its own benefits and drawbacks. So much is dependent on the place itself. Sometimes it all depends on my mood on a given day. Thinking about this subject though, I have come to a few conclusions:

1) Suburbs- I find I dislike the idea of suburbs the most, but also tend to find that I can be most comfortable in this type of environment for the longest amount of time. I’m sure it’s because I grew up in one. I basically live in one now. What I don’t like about them is all the driving. I’m also not a big fan of the landscape. I really dislike the way strip malls look and feel, but I use them nonetheless. I like areas with single family homes so long as there are sidewalks and at least some commercial areas within walking distance. I also think parks and public spaces in general greatly improve the feel of suburban neighborhoods.

2) Small towns- The quaint small town is such a romantic idea. Think Bedford Falls. A place where everyone exists as part of a larger community, its citizens essentially all one big extended family. Most small towns though, aren’t really that great. Sinclair Lewis saw them as places where the smart left and the unlucky stayed. Small towns can be kind of boring too. When opportunities are limited, especially economic ones, it takes a toll on the population, especially on young people. The best small towns, in my opinion, are the ones that have just a little more to offer. Either by a) being close to an urban center (some overlap with suburbs, I realize) b) having seasonal population changes (such as a large part-time summer community) or c) having a college, and thus becoming a college town, though I think those often have their own unique set of challenges that accompany them.

3) Cities- Walt Whitman said that city air breathes freer. I think he was right in some ways. Cities offer opportunity and variety, in all sorts of different ways. They also tend to be more expensive, more competitive, more crime-ridden and less comfortable to live in than other places. I have a real fondness for cities but my personality isn’t always compatible with city life. Cities are often exhilarating, but I usually find I’m ready to go home after a while. The best cities to live in, for me anyway, are smaller cities. Places that offer a taste of urban life but don’t go overboard. I’m thinking of places like Pasadena or Northampton. It’s also very important that a small city have a functioning economy. This applies mainly to the Northeast, but there are so many smaller cities that were once prosperous but have now fallen on hard times and are thoroughly unpleasant now. The best example I can think of is a place like Springfield, Massachusetts. It should be a nice place to live, but it’s actually absolutely terrible.

So to recap: Suburbs are good when they have some mixed zoning, sidewalks, and access to public spaces. Small Towns are good when they have part-year residents, a college, or are in close proximity to other unique areas (ie, a big city). Big cities are great to visit, but the best ones to live in are smaller ones that have strong economies.

Again, this all just my own personal opinion.

Friday, November 14, 2008

The Rest of the Story

Now 90 year-old Paul Harvey offers up some Paul Harveyness:

Thursday, November 13, 2008

People are Getting Old

Ed McMahon and Henry Kissinger are 85

Carl Reiner and Bea Arthur are 86

Ricardo Montalban and Nancy Reagan are 87

John Paul Stevens and Ray Bradbury are 88

Andy Rooney and J.D. Salinger are 89

Paul Harvey and Don Pardo are 90

Ernest Borgnine and Kirk Douglas are 91

Eli Wallach and Walter Cronkite are 92

Les Paul is 93

Jack LaLanne is 94

Art Linkletter and Karl Malden are 96

John Wooden is 97

And Claude Levi-Strauss is 99

World Champion

I saw this guy's act at a club in New York about 6 months ago and thought it was the funniest live comedy performance I'd ever seen. If you don't think he's funny I can't talk to you anymore. He's on '30 Rock' so you should like him:

Soccer

Lewis Black on Nuclear Holocaust

I can't believe you guys don't like Lewis Black. I guess I won't press the issue, but here's a good bit of his, (in my opinion):

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Celebrity Sighting

Two in one day:

Lewis Black walking up Hudson near W. 10th st. in Greenwich Village around 1:00pm. Well-dressed but looking world-weary and pissed off.

Whoopi Goldberg, getting into an SUV limo in front of the ABC studios (where they film 'The View' among other shows), on the corner of W. 66th street and Columbus Ave., around 7:30 pm.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Fuzzy Memories

Past presidential elections and what I remember about them:

2008- I'll remember watching the returns here in this apartment. I'll remember going into the local community center to cast my vote. I'll remember Tina Fey's impression of Sarah Palin on SNL. I'll remember when at the top of the 11 o'clock hour the graphic came on NBC proclaiming Obama the new president elect. I'll remember my mom calling me, excited and relieved that it was finally all over.

2004- I was busy moving to the East Coast and starting up my first semester of grad school when the election and campaigns were going on, so I don't really remember it. I just remember waking up the morning after the election and finding out that it all came down to Ohio, just as it had all come down to Florida four years earlier. I also remember voting in an elementary school somewhere in Amherst.

2000- I remember how NBC initially called it for Gore, then finding out very late at night that Bush had actually won. I remember how heated the Florida debate became. I also remember voting at my old elementary school, and going back into the cafeteria for the first time, all those years later.

1996- I remember taking the day off work at the library because I wanted to watch the returns. This was the first presidential election I was old enough to vote in. I remember thinking Dole never really had a chance.

1992- I remember a similar excitement to this past Tuesday, when a younger Democrat was elected after 12 years of a Republican White House. I remember Clinton going on Arsenio Hall and playing the saxophone. I remember Ross Perot.

1988- I remember watching the returns, and watching Bush beat Dukakis handily. I remember all the talk about Lloyd Bentsen and Dan Quayle. I remember Willy Horton and reading in People magazine that Kitty Dukakis used to be such an alcoholic that she would drink lysol.

1984- I remember Geraldine Ferraro and Walter Mondale. I remember how everyone seemed to love Reagan except for my parents. I remember Mondale only winning Minnesota and D.C.

1980- I vaguely remember Reagan winning and my mom being pissed. I sort of understood what a president was and new that George Washington had been one a long time ago, and I think I asked my mom if Reagan would be on the one dollar bill now. I remember my sister and her friends singing (to the tune of the Oscar Mayer jingle) "...cause Jimmy Carter has a way of screwing up the U.S.A."

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Cities Rated

It turns out I’ve been to 15 of the 30 largest metropolitan areas in the United States. Some I’ve spent a lot of time in (New York, Los Angeles, Seattle) and some I’ve done little more than drive through (San Jose, Phoenix). Using no particular criteria other than my own subjective opinion I’ve ranked the places from 1 to 15. 1 being the place I liked best, 15 the place I liked least:

1. Boston- This has to be at the top of my list. It's a really beautiful city and a very refined, cultured place. It has just about everything one could want in a city-- major sports teams, great museums, a comprehensive subway system,-- but it isn't too big or unruly. I'd move there in a heartbeat but the Wifey isn't too keen on the place. Her chief complaint: too homogenous.

2. San Francisco- Beautiful place. Great weather. Real international feel. Again, just the right size. Surrounding areas are nice too. I like the fact that in some ways it feels like an old east coast city, but still has a very west coast vibe.

3. New York- Hard to be objective on this one. Probably should be number one but I know it too well to put it up top. Really doesn't compare to any other city on the list in many ways. Has everything, but loses points for being so big and noisy. Undoubtedly America's greatest city, if not my absolute favorite.

4. San Diego- Nice place. Comfortable place. Enjoyable weather and a relaxed vibe. Am a big fan of the Balboa Park area. Great restaurants downtown. Biggest complaint-- leave the coast and the fun disintegrates rapidly. Hard not to like though.

5. Chicago- Great city. Fun place despite some rough edges. Tons of character to this place. Downtown is amazingly clean and polished. Biggest complaint-- feels more like an overgrown small American town than an international hub.

6. Los Angeles- Again, hard to be objective, although you might be surprised how much time and energy I've spent defending this place since I've moved to the east coast. Truly a world city, has so much to offer. Has a lot of crappy areas though, and surprisingly poor infrastructure compared to most other places on this list.

7. Seattle- Overall a nice place. Clean and green, but not always particularly exciting. The salmon is good and the view of Mt. Rainier is stunning when it's not too cloudy to see it, but after that it's a lot like Southern California on a very rainy day. Very homogenous with a weird white-trash feel in some parts.

8. Portland, Oregon- Not too different from Seattle. Green and pleasant but maybe not a ton of there there. Would be more appealing if it weren't so isolated from any other big cities.

9. Denver- Nice place. Would put it in the same category as Seattle and Portland, only in the mountains instead of in a forest by the sea. Perfectly fine place but probably not one that would draw you from other parts of the country, unless of course you're big on mountain climbing.

10. Baltimore- Has a lot of cool things to offer, but is in a lot of ways kind of a crappy town. Huge swaths are little more than slums, yet it's also a fun place. Lots and lots of character but too damn hot in the summer and you're playing the good neighborhood, bad neighborhood game every other block.

11. San Jose- Nice enough but kind of boring. Nothing there that you can't find anywhere else with the exception of the Winchester House.

12. Philadelphia- Surprisingly unpleasant place. Where did it go wrong and Boston go right? Nothing but a string of bad neighborhoods surrounding a sketchy downtown with a few historic monuments. Has the history but is lacking the charm. All the grittiness of New York with none of the grandeur.

13. Washington D.C. - I find this place interesting. There are supposedly some nice residential places, like Georgetown, and DuPont circle has a perfectly fine New Haven-y kind of vibe, but so far as I can tell 99% of the city is one big ghetto. The other one percent is all the monuments that are worth seeing once, but then it's best to get the hell out.

14. Las Vegas- The strip is an interesting place, I'll give you that. I would probably have fun if I lived there, at least until I got sick of the casinos, which would probably take at least a few weeks. The surrounding residential areas of the city are some of the most depressing places I've ever seen. They remind me of the crappier parts of the East San Gabriel Valley on the hottest, smoggiest days of the year. Only L.A. isn't 20 minutes away, it's 4 hours away. Ugh, kill me now.

15. Phoenix- Why does this city exist? I can find no redeeming qualities. It's hot, it's dry, it's crowded. The desert may have a certain beauty to it but I sure don't see it. Not much to offer aside from a bad sunburn.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

The Wonders of the Internet

He died in 1964, yet there's a picture of my grandfather when he was my age on the World Wide Web:

Photobucket

What I find most remarkable is how little I resemble him.

Who Was President When the President Was Born?

1. George Washington -(none)
2. John Adams -(none)
3. Thomas Jefferson -(none)
4. James Madison -(none)
5. James Monroe -(none)
6. John Quincy Adams -(none)
7. Andrew Jackson -(none)
8. Martin Van Buren -(none)
9. William Henry Harrison -(none)
10. John Tyler -George Washington
11. James Polk -George Washington
12. Zachary Taylor -(none)
13. Millard Fillmore -John Adams
14. Franklin Pierce -Thomas Jefferson
15. James Buchanan -George Washington
16. Abraham Lincoln -Thomas Jefferson
17. Andrew Johnson -Thomas Jefferson
18. Ulysses S. Grant -James Monroe
19. Rutherford B. Hayes -James Monroe
20. James Garfield -Andrew Jackson
21. Chester A. Arthur -Andrew Jackson
22. Grover Cleveland -Martin Van Buren
23. Benjamin Harrison -Andrew Jackson
24. Grover Cleveland -Martin Van Buren
25. William McKinley -John Tyler
26. Theodore Roosevelt -James Buchanan
27. William Howard Taft -James Buchanan
28. Woodrow Wilson -Franklin Pierce
29. Warren G. Harding -Andrew Johnson
30. Calvin Coolidge -Ulysses S. Grant
31. Herbert Hoover -Ulysses S. Grant
32. Franklin Roosevelt -Chester A. Arthur
33. Harry Truman -Chester A. Arthur
34. Dwight Eisenhower -Benjamin Harrison
35. John F. Kennedy -Woodrow Wilson
36. Lyndon Johnson -Theodore Roosevelt
37. Richard Nixon -William Howard Taft
38. Gerald Ford -Woodrow Wilson
39. Jimmy Carter -Calvin Coolidge
40. Ronald Reagan -William Howard Taft
41. George Bush -Calvin Coolidge
42. Bill Clinton -Harry Truman
43. George W. Bush -Harry Truman
44. Barack Obama -John F. Kennedy

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Small Towns

Interesting post about their sad current status.

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Another Creepy Numbers Station Broadcast

I like this one a little better than the other. Also in German, it sounds like an adult woman's voice. Again, not sure what's up with the images: